Wednesday, July 30, 2008

James,Janitor

James,the senior janitor at one of the largest high rise buildings on Lake Shore Drive was amused,again.
His great pleasure in life was seeing the garbage people threw down their chutes.
It had become his life's passion.All the wonderful items people tossed,electronics of every sort,phones,computers that survived the fall,radios, alarm clocks and so much more.
He thought he could make a living selling this stuff.
His first day back after a weeks vacation was looked forward to with great anticipation. Monday, the best day to do some serious sorting.The weekend was when people seemed to throw out the best trash,he just loved it.
He tried to learn how not to smell the rotten food and avoid touching all the nasty object in the trash.
This Monday James found a round metal can,it looked to him to be the kind of can cookies came in.He was going to toss it when he heard the rattle of something inside.It sounded like metal he thought.He tried to pry it open but it seemed to be stuck.he got a screwdriver and tried again to lift the lid.
Frustrated he put it aside and decided to back to his regular sorting.This batch had 2 cell phones,one worked.He then found 2 lap tops,not working but he thought there might be hope.
He worked his shift and forgot about the cookie can until he woke late at night in his little apartment next to the boiler room.
He went back to the trash room,found his can and decided to try to drill some holes in the top.
After a few holes he heard something that sound like a voice.Scared as he was he could not resist drilling more holes.
The voice spoke again,James I am going to kill you.
Panicked now James put the can down.
He stepped back and tried to smash the can with his foot.
The top popped off.Out of the can came James's worst nightmare.
Peeling off it's metal shroud,the little man inside walked over to James.
James last thoughts were of little men who lived in cans should be left alone.These cans should never be opened.
The little man went back to his can.He waited.

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